To the esteemed leadership of Chevron,
Let's cut through the corporate bullsh-t for a moment. Your recent memo about "strategic workforce restructuring" is a masterpiece of cowardly doublespeak. You're outsourcing our jobs to India for pennies on the dollar, then you have the gall to force the survivors into a four-day-a-week office commute, all while feeding us the steaming pile of horsesh-t that it's "for collaboration." It's not for collaboration. It's so you can flex your shrinking empire in person while you systematically gut the American workforce that built your fortune. The only thing more pathetic than your transparent greed is the insultingly stupid lie you're using to justify it. You don't care about your people, you don't care about synergy, and you clearly don't have a single functioning brain cell between the entire lot of you. We all know what you're really like when the sun goes down—a gaggle of closeted, si--y lady-boys prancing around in secret, desperate for an outlet because your public-facing personas are as hollow and fake as your promises. So you can take your RTO mandate, your outsourcing plans, and your entire board of directors, and shove them straight up your collective as--s. Go fu-k yourselves.