No, don't be silly. We can't have airlines supported by DXC. No-one would fly on them!
"May Day! May Day! May Day! UA291L Engine failure. We are proceeding North West lead and then heading inbound.
- Good morning Sir and how are you today? My name is . Are you having a nice day, Sir? Where are you calling from?
"May day. We'd like to establish on the inbound radio zero eight four, climbing to three and half thousand feet and then we will advise you of our intention."
- Can I Have your name, Sir?
"May Day! UA 291. We confirm UA291"
- And how are you spelling that?
"May day! We have a main engine blowout and have lost all cabin instrumentation."
- I see. No problem. No problem, sir. Do you have your asset number?
"May Day! Can you say again?"
- Sir, it should be on a label under the front panel. It will have DXC and then a long number underneath it.
"May Day! Tower. Negative. There is no visible label or marking on the panel. Request further instructions"
- Ok Sir. Have you tried turning it off and on again?
"Tower can you confirm your call. Reiterating our intention. All on the third On the KH1 zero take 3. May Day UA291."
- Sir, I will taise a ticket for you and someone will get back to you within 3 working days
"Pan. Pan. Negative. UA281. Just to confirm: we need urgent instructions to restore panel. Our intention is to land on 265 right, we're not anticipating any problems on vacating the runway. We would, however, of course, require fire support and visual inspection of the braking before we vacate but we should stop on the parallel."
- Sir, no problem. I am just putting you on hold whilst i type all this in. I won't be one moment.