Thread regarding Schlumberger Ltd. layoffs

how to become a manager

All you need to do is to update your CNP so that everyone knows that you had already held several management positions since the age of 12 for 20 years. Don't even need a diploma as you have been drilling since 6 unless you want a fellowship. If so, you need to speak English and discover something that nobody else has even thought about discovering and presenting it in a conference, preferably drilling and certainly with your manager, and later writing about somewhere. In no way file a so-called SETC statement as this is just for losers like gin in place of cognac in 1720 AD. The easiest way is to try to stick your and your managers' names in patents and/or articles already having a couple of dozens of other names so nobody questions. If your name is somehow excluded later but the manager's remains, you may still be able to advise. The best thing to do is to advise on a variety of topics and to everyone otherwise you risk to get a retirement package stating that you have already been drilling since 6 for 20 years. Don't forget to file an RIR when your coworker falls asleep in his chair or disappears for an hour or so. You would know in the latter case that he is having a phone interview sitting in his car. Don't file if he disappears for a day as he is probably waiting in line for the next drug test nor do you file or especially ask if he disappears forever. In general,being a manager is fun as all you do is surround yourself by people who obey and whom you trust as having more experience than yourself so you can follow their advice. You are an actor playing someone else's multiple roles at once. I can go on and on but the point I hope is understood - its fun, its money, and its an experience allowing to get a position in which you don't even need advisors anymore.

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| 562 views | | 7 replies (last April 24, 2015) | Reply
Post ID: @OP+B8agaub

7 replies (most recent on top)

Shit load of middle management which is shit

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Post ID: @2gga+B8agaub

They r good for nothing. 10 plus managers with shit load of leads that each one of them sees it his way or the high way. HR/IT r there for formality only.

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Post ID: @1Q4k+B8agaub

I always aspired to be the Vice President of acronyms.......

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Post ID: @1T86+B8agaub

Well in SLB there are more managers than people working, they are a joke, manager of the toilet and powerpoint useless they should fire all of them IT support and HR then SLB would be a good please if they kept the senior people than do all the work

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Post ID: @1MTW+B8agaub

This guy has the right mindset, your hired!

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Post ID: @14gT+B8agaub

And I am an advisor, just cannot sleep anymore.

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Post ID: @1R1n+B8agaub

Worked like a charm, I'm manager now.

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Post ID: @1iu4+B8agaub

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