A new article recently leaked that Chevron's most expensive platform had a major incident this week resulting in it collapsing and being thus rendered a junk asset waiting to be written down. The "IT Foundational Platform" as it was referred to, was the mostly costly MCP sanctioned by ITC (like dat UWT trash, D2D, & all other worthless ITC efforts). This terrible accident claimed the lives of 2 scrum masters & injured 3 agile coach contractors. There goes this year's CIP....sh*t! Thankfully, no employee software engineers were hurt when the incident took place, primarily because none existed at Chevron. A root cause analysis was ordered by the CIO, and the report findings indicated that the root cause was the stupidity of the #ImagineIT team's brilliant decision to downsize employee technical staff headcount who were encouraged to leave with a sweet payout last year coupled with the digital transformation of ITC into to the new Business Unit called "Managed Service Provider" MSPBU. The new contractors assigned to the IT Foundational Platform were so incompetent that even the contractors working at the help desk complain about how useless they are. I was told by a senior "technical-technical-technical" platform manager, IT plans to spend 25% less per contractor, but let them take 4 times longer to get the same work done. Seems like they are using the same lean sigma cost cutting strategies used on Gorgon and Wheatstone.
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Good read! Not too far from reality given the current CIO
I thought i canned you IT losers during Project Alpha...DAMN "IT"!
True @1ufu, we don’t really have any C-Teams in Chevron or A-Teams of mention for that matter. But I can count on more than one hand how many “F” Teams we have. What a shame. Where’s our leadership in this company and what about accountability? Since we’re not focusing on the priorities, we are reaping the consequences.
Troll bait.
Maybe chevron will finally realize that most of their “IT” folks are lame, especially the old team leads who thought they were hot sh*t. Now that they are individual contributors, they haven’t a clue what to do. Not like their lazy a$$es want to do anything. Wake up you has-been team leads and managers!! Perhaps you need to start doing real work if your hollow brains are even capable! Best thing about this ROM was getting rid of useless layers of “management”. But now, they need to replace these folks with real IT talent. But in reality, what capable IT person worth their salt these days would want to work for chevron??!! Chevron gets the bottom of the barrel talent, unlike the old days when you could count on your team lead to help solve technical problems!!
Is this all a joke or did something really happen? All the power points were air tight and rock solid. I can’t imagine anything going wrong.
Who you talking C team?!!!! There is no C team at Chevron!
Being based in the Bay Area, CVX will never get a good IT team. Anyone with half a brain will go work in tech. CVX gets the C team rejects in the IT department and it shows.
Who even had the idea of centralizing IT when clearly the thing they were struggling with most was delivering value add, relevant products? Terrible idea, opposite effect. Half the Microsoft stuff was terrible, but nothing to how unstable and missing the mark all the custom stuff coming out of ITC was. Still, If they’d done a halfway competent job of current state analysis on the BUs it wouldn’t be the awful mess it is now with no people to run or finish anything let alone ‘digitally transform’
IT in Chevron really means Inefficient Technology. Everyone knows that, but many don’t say a word of it. They just go about jobs the best they can.
Clearly OP isn’t familiar with the Typhoon platform.
@atu+1afTcqCy - Eww, do not lump us in with Microsoft.
Wow this post has added more value then #ImagineIT has since October 2020.
LOL, IT people complaining all the time here. You guys should have been cut and replaced by Microsoft and Apple.
Great read. If you were the chief diversity officer I'd definitely read your emails and not have them marked as spam
Is there a link on here to the layoff's site, I thought this was it, is this a Chevron IT joke?
IT is efficient, they got my computer to start working again by following their simple 3 step procedure:
1) Turn it off
2) Turn it on
3) Told me to get another computer