Thread regarding Bank of New York Mellon Corp. layoffs

Mortal Kombat - Your Soul is Mine

With Mortal Kombat II hitting movie theaters and video game platforms this summer, employees here swear RV has been studying for a cameo. Not as a hero—those roles require budgets—but as the impeccably calm, soul-stealing iconic super-villain who whispers “Your soul is mine!” every time another “efficiency initiative” rolls out and heads must roll.

In this corporate remake, positive operating leverage is his finishing move.
Shareholders cheer as expenses drop, margins rise, and the stock price performs a “flawless victory. “

Meanwhile, employees brace for the monthly and quarterly “global realignments,” which arrive with the predictability of a franchise sequel.

Associates joke that RV has mastered a rare power: absorbing the power of others, all while maintaining the GLP1 expression of someone who already knows the next round’s outcome.

In this Mortal Kombat remake, no one throws a punch. DM's spreadsheets do all the fighting.


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| 2 views | | 5 replies (last April 18) | Reply
Post ID: @OP+1kpe728dy

5 replies (most recent on top)

@b0 if it were that easy we’d all be gone.

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Post ID: @dq+1kpe728dy

😂

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Post ID: @b6+1kpe728dy

Mortal Kombat.. bah!
This place is more like return to ‘Deliverance’.
Employees are getting it up the hershey highway and being told to like it and ‘ squeel like a p.ig’. There is nothing sophisticated, cool or villain admirable about this polluted toilet.

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Post ID: @b3+1kpe728dy

First of all, I love Karl Urban in anything. Judge Dredd is so underrated.

Secondly, you folks need to leave BNY. I'm so much happier since exiting in Jan.

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Post ID: @b0+1kpe728dy

I feel like the losing combatant, swaying on my feet, trying to remain standing with my last ounce of will to live and then hearing RV’s voice during performance review time telling my manager “finish him”

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Post ID: @a6+1kpe728dy

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