Thread regarding Schlumberger Ltd. layoffs

SIS -brace for impact

The SIS strategy for 2019 is out. In 3 words: "Lower The Ambition". 2019 will be yet another year of minimum delivery. The much-awaited digital wonders won't be ready before 2020.

And by then you will be able to....create maps and manage spreadsheets IN THE CLOUD. Exciting!

The marketing strategy? Purely quantitative. A high density of "digital keywords" should do the trick:

"Elastically scalable digital maps are created in the cloud from well tops extracted from the Data Lake and filtered using big data analytics and machine learning. Convolutional neural networks and other machine vision technologies automatically identify low-confidence areas which can be fixed interactively using IoT*. Additional features such as user-defined contour interval will be deployed automatically to the Google Cloud Platform in 2021 using Continuous Delivery".

You'd nearly forget that this is the cheapest, oldest and most common software feature, eh?

*a Bluetooth mouse

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| 2282 views | | 11 replies (last October 19, 2018) | Reply
Post ID: @OP+VzVILiv

11 replies (most recent on top)

Yeah these s---ers taking our money. Fire them all.

Wish for massive layoff.

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Post ID: @9mmj+VzVILiv

Doesn't matter, have you seen their salaries?

They s---ing 💰 really well.

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Post ID: @9soy+VzVILiv

Absolutely

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Post ID: @3nso+VzVILiv

SIS is where your career at SLB ends. Most senior managers are mentally ill.

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Post ID: @2alu+VzVILiv

Sounds like a serious reality check is underway - hahaha

Really? none of the PK SLB pipe dream fantasies are delivering anything???

How can this be?

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Post ID: @2zfp+VzVILiv

They can accelerate through an acquisition or collaboration with a competitor who are way ahead of the game.

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Post ID: @1vnr+VzVILiv

In India we make state of arts computer s and programs.

All this good programs make by India. We make this too.

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Post ID: @brd+VzVILiv

As far as I can see Engage to Excel is dead in the water....oh dear! Has the penny dropped yet?

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Post ID: @jwv+VzVILiv

Really? Well - this is not the internet of cool things we were sold by PK

Is this just more pie in the sky? Rig of the future 2?

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Post ID: @rxl+VzVILiv

Apollo , we have a problem.

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Post ID: @djj+VzVILiv

If they make that happen so that is good.

The question is would they be able to do so ?

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Post ID: @kwy+VzVILiv

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