I was drinking the night before and may still have alcohol in my blood which I know was a stupid thing to do. But, I have a wife and 4 kids to look after and I need my job and driving license. If I get the repairs done myself nobody is gonna know what happened I hope. Any body with experience of this in big blue?
35 replies (most recent on top)
Just be sure to always lock your computer when you sneak out to shop or car for a whiff of whatever you fancy this time.
Avoid RIR written against you by all avenues.
Kind of like the idea of drive it to Boss house and then report stolen. However, all Boss at SLB have security Cams for alert of drunken/stoned employee problems.
Just wear an ISIS Scarf and stolen clothes from Salvation Army Dumpster...Do it about Noon to not appear out of the norm....You will be fine...Do not worry.
If I can get away with smoking mary jane and doing lines of blow in my company vehicle, so can you buddy! Oh did I tell you I am a manager that just laid off a bunch of my subordinates last week? Yeah, I had to let them go because they were being snitches LOLL.
It's prohibited, disgraceful and highly discriminating against our gender equality policy.
Are you allowed to use your company phone to make xxxx movies? I have been doing that for a while now and it just occurred to me there may be a policy about that. Anybody know ?
Total secrecy and denial is the best policy. Just lie through your teeth and deny everything or blame one of your work colleagues. That's the true Schlumnerger way that I was taught
Don't report anything and try to cover it up. Worked great for me when I was almost caught drinking with a ho in my company vehicle at a clients rig site
Sounds like it could be a wireline third country import. This is usually what you see on the corrupt international level. Perhaps the Middle East or Africa. Most, if not all, of the Smith legacy people are to honest for this horseplay. Only look and see the state of their countries.
My advise , tell no one.......oops!
Can only be NAM employee with this type of behavior from the old good ol boy school
Those aholes should have been the first to be laid off. They are not true SLB employees and disrespect our safety culture. Someone should trace this guy and report him if he doesn't get fired on his own.
I have seen some of the legacy smith guys here in NAM who break every QHSE rule in the book including drinking driving and driving with phones, etc
They are being weeded out but probably still a few of them around
i am wondering if you are someone who was released and has nothing better to do, or still at work with no work to do, so making up stories to keep yourself entertained
What location are do you work? I know some HSE guys and perhaps we can sort this out for you. Email me at my personal address pkibsgaard@slb.com
Let me know and Good luck
I ain't no troll buddy and need some guidance here with this problem. I ain't used to all the procedures and rules in Schlumberger and need to find a solution to this so I can keep my job!!!!
You are either full of sh-- or too stupid to live. Stop trolling and get back to work. Your posts don't add up. Your drunk, yet driving slow... but crash anyway??? You don't usually talk on the phone.... but just this once you did???? Everyone should ignore this thread; it's a complete lie made up by some troll with too much free time.
Oh sh-- - got a call early this morning and my QHSE manager has asked me to bring in my vehicle as he wants to check the drive monitor! Is this a coincidence or what??? He also asked me to bring my cell phone!! Why does he want to see my phone??
Now I was having a conversation with my wife when the crash happened but there is no way he could know that. I don't normally talk on the phone while driving but I was going so slow and my wife called so I decided to answer which I now realize was a dumb thing to do. I don't know if this is just a regular check with the QHSE manager or if he has been told by someone. I don't think so but now I am real worried. Anybody got any ideas what I can do now ???
I hope someone from HAL or BHI gets hammered and plows their company vehicle into your entire family while they are crossing the street (or walking through your trailer park). And let's see how sympathetic you are because they got hammered due to the stress of not knowing if they would be laid off. You are a dirtbag. I hope you get caught. The DIMM records abrupt stops. I hope your RAG score goes to zero and you get written up at least in order to get unrestricted by JMC. So glad to see you taking the typical pussy crybaby approach of making excuses for your shadiness. You'd rather gloat about how you got away with it. Karma's a b---h, you'll get yours some day. Garbage like you should be fired.... would save someone else who is not a pos!!!
What will unplugging and plugging the drive monitor do ? Isn't the drive conditions already recorded?
I wasn't driving too fast when I crashed so hopefully won't look like a crash or abrupt stop but not sure
The monitor device absolutely records speed and the biggest thing is abrupt stopping. And accident will definitely show up some data of sudden stop or speeding.
Get the car fixed... The device is plugable. Lower left of the steering wheel. Shut the car off then pull it out. Remember to plug the device back in before your car is started again
Great job buddy. That's what this forum is good for to help our brothers who may need some help from the ever more intrusive big corporations who want to run our lives. I hope it pays off for you buddy
Thanks Guys for sharing your ideas helping me to keep my job. I have taken a big risk here but I think it will pay off and I would have been fired anyway if I had reported it. The next time I will try to drink less the night before a new job comes up! Sometimes the stress of not knowing if you will be laid off the next day drives a man to alcohol. I would never drink during the day or during a job but at night the time is my own and I can do what I like with it. This crash had nothing to do with me having a few beers the night before and was just plain unlucky but try explaining that to the safety manager and he will fire your assno questions asked.
Deliberately crash the car now and call your boss to tell them you just got in a wreck. Or go kill yourself....your only two options at this point.
Burn the damn thing down crazy mutthafuccka
Guys be nice, this is the guy who decides who gets layed off. Help him out...
You owe me...
Take the vehicle to autozone, tell them your check light came on they will plug it up, if they cannot plug their device in then you know its a tracking device, the tracking device is where they would plug in it, so go to autozone or an autoparts store keep us informed. With all this crap we all need a good laugh.
Why go home? If I were you I'd go hit the neighborhood bar and, if possible, a titty bar. It's time to celebrate! You can always call in sick tomorrow. Heck payday is this Friday so more celebration should be planned this weekend.
Again, Congratulation.
By the way which segment and location/geomarket do you work at/in?
Well I got the vehicle fixed and it looks like new again. Just wondering about the driving monitor and if it records minor collisions or not - anybody know?
I dont think it does and if so I am going to be home and dry hopefully
I hope you get fired either way you jackhole! If to your post is legit you deserve to get sh--canned. Failure to report is grounds for termination. You should also be fired for driving drunk on a SLB vehicle. And spare us your whining about "my job..... my family.... my kids"
Boo fricking hoo! You obviously don't care enough to think about them when you decided to drive drunk. If you don't care enough to look out for them, why should you expect anyone else to. Fired, no severance, not eligible for rehire. HATE worthless turds such as yourself who make bad choices and play the victim. Good ppl are still being let go. Screw you!
be honest, you may have to be disciplined, but it is way better than lying and getting caught. Honesty is always the best way to go.
Be Honest were you drunk or high? Your insurance can fix it claim it on your insurance. But be honest you messed up and you will be terminated. You know the deal, there are no more connections or hook ups their all fired. SMH Dependent on the company vehicle most have tracking devices i dont know which one you drive but they do. By the way
Your Fired
If you didn't have a driving monitor and they don't already know, you might pull it off.
If there is no police report, none of your compatriots saw it and you are smart enough to tell no one you are almost there. Last step, can you get the work done in a shop that isn't going to ask questions? If it's a small town now is not the time to support local businesses. Don't go search for that reputable better business bureau 4 star shop. Go to the bad part of town where English is a 2nd language and you may need an interpreter. Places that prefer cash and don't know what credit cards are for because they don't have computers or Internet. Keeps VIN number checks from happening and potential problems from surfacing later on.
Tell them you'll bring them a bottle of the best tequila you can find for fast turnaround service, something like Casa Herradura Seleccion Suprema.
You need fast and quiet service my friend. A $300 bottle will incentivize the proper outcome. Go cheap and you'll go home with a pink slip after someone wonders where your car went while it waits in body shop jail.
Any problem has a solution given the proper motivation and mentoring.
Drive it to your supervisors home, leave it there and report it stolen. Your boss will be arrested, you'll be promoted as you'll be deemed management material
May considered leaving some meth or crack in the vehicle as well. Remember to leave prints everywhere, particularly on the meth/crack vial. Go into work and act as nothing has happen. You'll be fine.
Good luck and please keep us posted
since*
Definitely fired. Had a friend with the same experience several years back with his company vehicle. You're not going to lose your license more than likely sense the police weren't originally involved at the scene but SLB will find out, trust me. When they do, not only will you be fired but something like that will prevent you from getting similar positions in the future. Also, probably wasn't the most wise decision posting something that serious and private on a public board for your bosses to see. IMO.
fired!
https://www.thelayoff.com/t/CI0iM4u