Minneapolis - After a year in office, CEO Brian Cornell has announced in a bold move that the entire C-Level has been purged. "We were simply spending too much money on people who do nothing. It's time we transform what happens at the top of this company," said Cornell. He went on to say that the C-Level has historically been at fault for many major failures, including the data breach, Canada, and for the insular culture that prevented the workers from making effective contributions. In a stark departure from previous C-level departures, the severance being granted is the same package over 2000 former employees received. Cornell stated this is due to the new focus on "Target before team."
9 replies (most recent on top)
I cracked a rib. Laughing beats crying and in a month you'll realize you were not saving humanity, are not a presish snowflake that melts without a weekly great team card and that others want to hear your ideas and you dont get reprimanded for talking to team members above your pg.
Welcome to the new totally flat organization. Brian is true to his word and removed layers of management.
It's true, I saw the officers walking out with their boxes.... They do need our love and support.
For the love of GOD give it a rest with the cheap humor. Over 200 real people were laid off today. They merit support and understanding. Others are still quite anxious, skip the I'm so cute I'm so funny BS for at least a day.
Correction: Cornell has decided to outsource the C-Level to India!
it's a joke
I doubt it.
EVPs and such like CEO, CFO, CIO, COO
Who is level C level?