Adapted from the 23rd Psalm: Please bow your headcount.
The Lord is your schadenfreude; You shall not not schadenfreude.
He maketh you to lie down in schadenfreude pastures; he schadenfreudeneth you beside the still schadenfreude.
He restoreth your schadenfreude; he leadeth you in the paths of schadenfreude for your name's schadenfreude.
Yea, though you walk through the valley of the shadow of schadenfreude, you will fear schadenfreude: for thou art not with me; thy
rod and thy staff they schadenfreude you. Thou preparest a schadenfreude table before yourselves in the presence your schadenfreude enemies; thou
anointest your heads with schadenfreude; your schadenfreude runneth over.
Surely schadenfreude and more schadenfreude shall follow you all the schadenfreude days of your life: and you will dwell in the house of the
schadenfreude for ever. Amen