Who are these people and offices giving out free lunches
12 replies (most recent on top)
Listen up, Internet Dwellers!
Let’s address the pink elephant in the room – those impending layoffs. Ah yes, the corporate world’s subtle way of saying, “Surprise! We’re making changes, and by ‘changes,’ we mean fewer of you.”
Who wants constant job security anyway? Embracing the adrenaline rush of uncertainty is much more thrilling!
Listen, I don't know if there are any layoffs planned or not. Don't listen to me. These comments are about as legally binding as a superhero's promise not to use their powers for personal gain – in other words, not at all.
Stay strong and remember, it’s not you – it’s just business. And by “business,” we mean the usual corporate rollercoaster.
At least you still have your free lunches, right? Because nothing says “job satisfaction” like mystery meat Mondays and taco-less Tuesdays. Truly, the stuff of dreams.
Sincerely,
Your Friendly Neighborhood Non-Superhero Friend
P.S. Remember to catch the upcoming movie about the guy in the red suit and the Angry Canadian. It’s like a romantic comedy, but with more violence and fewer emotions. Think Lethal We-pon, but with more chimichangas and claws. Maximum effort, people. Stay minty!
I heard from a friend who had a friend who knew a Director. Sh-t is getting real. You have been warned.
@olc+1tDJCaAV take your own advice
Not happening this year, get to work.
Too late for company to save on RSU vesting. With 2 month required notice period earliest termination date would be around Sep 21 if laid off today. Tmobile will have to pay out February RSU vesting for upcoming layoff round.
I speculate that week of August 5 the axes will drop. They don’t want to go into company all hands on Aug 15 without first having finished this round.
One question not clear is regarding ESPP. If laid off on August 5 just an example, 2 month garden leave requirement puts you at October 5, which is beyond the Sep 30 purchase date.
Anyone know if we would still get that final 15% stock purchase discount or if they will try to sneakily return cash value only?
And without any surprise our AI bot chimes in.
Need to get those cuts out soon to realize savings on the new mid-year RSU vesting date.
OP, good threads below seem to suggest disagreement between RF, SWOPS, and FOPS, as to which team/s should be downsized or outsourced.
@OP+1tBuhuYe
2024-07-20T18:32:21Z
“Future of RF and Area Model”
https://www.thelayoff.com/t/1tBuhuYe
@OP+1tyIfULg
2024-07-17T21:28:37Z
”Ulf's Email - Get Ready”
https://www.thelayoff.com/t/1tyIfULg
@OP+1tp7CKQK
2024-07-08T03:21:23Z
”Layoffs Start Tomorrow”, (5619 Views, 51 Replies)
https://www.thelayoff.com/t/1tp7CKQK
Sounds eerily similar to last year
There will be cuts. VPs are keeping their lips buttoned as to timing or quantity.
I'm asking specifically about this and next month.