Thread regarding VMware layoffs

Imagine its your last day at VMware, you're getting the boot. What would you do knowing you could completely get away with it???

Lol, just for funsies to lighten the mood. I'm in need of some laughs, i can't be bothered to be stressed about this acquisition any longer.

by
| 1961 views | | 18 replies (last October 22, 2023) | Reply
Post ID: @OP+1pbI9z8e

18 replies (most recent on top)

Cut the grass and clean the car.

by
| | Reply
Post ID: @2hvn+1pbI9z8e

Adopt a Pivot

by
| | Reply
Post ID: @2ilf+1pbI9z8e

Put a screensaver and background of Magoo and Betsy messing around

by
| | Reply
Post ID: @1nok+1pbI9z8e

You do realize that of VMW employee lifers who haven't looked for work in tow decades or more are terrified. There's nothing funny about this situation if you are scared of what comes next. Have some empathy!

by
| | Reply
Post ID: @1hyr+1pbI9z8e

Send a well crafted email to each individual employee that they have been fired with no severance and owe VMware $10,000 for back pay due to all the not working from home they did.

by
| | Reply
Post ID: @1dvo+1pbI9z8e

Bïtch-slap the leadership teams

by
| | Reply
Post ID: @1tbc+1pbI9z8e

More likely than not when you find out you are being let go, you will find out when you try and log in to your laptop.

They are not going to fire people and leave them with access to their systems.

by
| | Reply
Post ID: @1ycu+1pbI9z8e

Flood a Slack channel with d-mb memes.

by
| | Reply
Post ID: @1mqf+1pbI9z8e

"I noticed a new application installed on my laptop today. 'Trellix endpoint security' (data loss prevention). Anyone else?"

It's not new, just the updated name for the Mcafee software that was already installed.

by
| | Reply
Post ID: @1pmn+1pbI9z8e

Last day? I would do absolutely nothing for VMware. I would sleep in, order a pizza, and play video games while getting paid. Probably would put in some job applications to other companies too.

by
| | Reply
Post ID: @1gjl+1pbI9z8e

I'm not someone whose life revolves around work, so I'm not sure I'd do anything different. I might take a walk around Promontory... I remember when I moved into an office in "D" after starting out in a leased space in the Tibco building. Fun times.

by
| | Reply
Post ID: @1zar+1pbI9z8e

I noticed a new application installed on my laptop today. 'Trellix endpoint security' (data loss prevention). Anyone else?

Yes us too

by
| | Reply
Post ID: @1ptj+1pbI9z8e

The acquisition is failed and over. China won't approve the deal and BC can't go though.

by
| | Reply
Post ID: @1kzh+1pbI9z8e

Pi-s on mgr & Raghu

by
| | Reply
Post ID: @pva+1pbI9z8e

I'd fight every single euc sales rep especially the genius directors.

by
| | Reply
Post ID: @dcu+1pbI9z8e

@dqo+1pbI9z8e there’s people in Oasis channel asking about this, so there’s nothing to worry about

by
| | Reply
Post ID: @ewf+1pbI9z8e

I noticed a new application installed on my laptop today. 'Trellix endpoint security' (data loss prevention). Anyone else?

by
| | Reply
Post ID: @dqo+1pbI9z8e

I'd tell my colleague I like her, never told her so far because I don't like mixing personal and professional stuff together. But if i knew i'm no longer even working here..... then ...... I think I'll shoot my shot. It would be terrible timing........... because if I lose my job then so would she I think...............

by
| | Reply
Post ID: @gqd+1pbI9z8e

Post a reply

: