Thread regarding AT&T layoffs

There is a lot of bad information & advice being handed out. A lot of people do not like me & many of you may recognize my horrible writing skills. I do agree, my writing skills are at a 3rd grade level. It’s extremely hurtful & personal as to what’s happening around us. At some point we all must face this reality with courage & strength. When I lost my ability to take care of myself I was angry, confused and completely lost. I wasn’t a vegetable but I was worthless to those who counted on me. I lost my way & my faith. There are angels within AT&T that we built connections with & who know us personally. I’m so grateful for an AT&T Angel who said “metanoia”. I had no idea what it meant & the Angel said. “Repent” I was offended hurt, confused & a little offended. I didn’t do anything wrong, I’m loosing everything and I don’t know what to do. The angel went on explaining that when you have a sense of prickliness, repent. I appreciated the conversation but I honestly dismissed the idea because I wasn’t ready. Many horrible burnout weeks went by and I was exhausted & I wanted to end it all. I didn’t want this and I didn’t ask for it. Why me? I did everything right, I worked hard, I followed all the rules and I’m useless to myself & everyone. My mind, God, angels or something said “ You have 2 choices- End it now or Dye trying “. I didn’t know I had a choice. It definitely seemed a lot easier to end it but the idea that I actually could choose what I wanted to do. The thought of me having a choice was mind blowing. I made a conscious choice & commitment to myself to dye trying. I am purposely spelling it wrong. I was under the care of team of doctors who helped guide me but I would never be where I am today if I didn’t apply myself. I relearn everything I counted of & replied on my entire life “my knowledge & abilities to walk, read, drive, count, the use of common household appliances. I couldn’t identify objects, not even loved ones that I raised me. It wasn’t just hurtful to me but it affected those who loved me. I had a lot of work to do. How did I do it? I shut everything down as if I was gone. It hurt a lot of people but I needed to remove everyone’s voice. The voice’s that tell you what “They think” the opinions of others that try to help but have no clue of the personal affects of feeling overwhelmed & defeated. Now one is perfect & no matter what anyone believes it’s ok to have flaws. The one thing I had was a my personal commitment to myself & the ability to learn. I took these 2 very simple tools & put them to good use. Your not in control, your brain is. Everything happens for a reason and you just have to believe in yourself. Find the reason & apply yourself. There are a lot selfish & selfless people in the world. I am hopeful that everyone finds their way but not everyone has the same destination. If you have the ability to learn, then use it and apply yourself. Tap into what you do have and get motivated. Begging & pleading doesn’t work. I used to suffocate cry because I didn’t understand words that were spoken from fast talking. someone got so annoyed with me & told me to pull myself together. Wow what a hard pill to swallow. That was a very powerful pill, cause it worked. Today, I am thankful for all those really hard pills to swallow. words that appear to be cruel, hurtful & full of judgment are other people’s views of us. It’s not just one person because I’ve learned that people share opinions & talk about each other. The truth really hurts and some people have the courage to break the cardinal rule & speak candidly. I have many bonds with great leaders in the industry and just 1 is enough. Don’t have any expectations that you deserve anything in life, you’re not entitled & life is full of wonder surprises. View them as challenges & accept them with courage, strength & gratitude. If I have inspired you, please take your inspiration & share it as well. Everyone has a story, let’s pull ourselves together & apply ourselves . Live your best life and shine. I am grateful for all the AT&T angels out there. Keep thriving everyone! Ps~ Other people’s opinions are opinions, who we are must always be proven. Check yourself & look into the mirror. Talk to your reflection because that’s where all the answers are. Model who you want to be not who you portray yourself to be. Be honest with yourself & grow from there. Self assess, your capabilities may not be synced with your current abilities. Be honest & truthful with yourself is a great starting point. Doubt is a heavy burden, that doubt will weigh you down to keep you from moving forward. Name the doubt devil and dismiss it. Understand what you may not be able to do today doesn’t mean you can’t. If you have the ability to learn, that’s a gift & free to use anytime; anywhere. If it was easy it wouldn’t be worth it. Let’s be honest, no one was prepared for this but I can assure you, I wasn’t prepared to loose my mind. Godspeed~