I just don't know what to do at this point. I'm seeing a mental health professional and it's not helping.
I'm constantly worried about being laid off or fired for any infraction now. My director is doubling down on being demeaning remarks / overloading me with work. I'm the kind of person who fights back when pushed too hard. It's creating a viscous cycle where he pushes his behavior too far, then I stand up for myself, and then I worry about being let go.
I loved it when I started working here 5 years ago, but cooler heads don't seem to ever prevail or exist anymore, and it gets more disorganized each month.
I feel like this place is making me hate waking up every morning. Even on my weekends, I feel tons of emotional pain at intermittent times. Some days I get the urge to break down and cry even when I'm not at work.