Are you too excited about "the evolution of our operating model that drives acceleration of our growth engines while continuing to build momentum in the core?" This was probably the most coherent part of a message I recently got from one of our Leaders. I'm still not sure if he meant it seriously or as a joke. This is straight out of Dilbert.
Yeah, not related to layoffs, but boy this made me want to quit this place. Fast. Feel free to share here other nonsense you've received from our Top Tin.
These days Storage, backup, compute and even networking gear is relatively all the same. No one cares about speed anymore because everything is fast. You can buy from Pure, Dell or Hitachi and your systems won't know the difference.
Dell Storage is a joke, cause Dell/EMC never invented anything always stole.
Any updates from the March 24th all hands meeting ?????
@7njr+1fE56bhD backoff I'm a Dell emmployeee
I thought you were Stewie Griffin
stoooopid
It's best if you all Back Off! I know Chuck Norris. Chuck Norris spices up his steaks with pepper spray.
Back off or I'm going to tell my dad who's a VP.
@8qog+1fE56bhD nice you must be in management.
@7njr+1fE56bhD backoff I'm a Dell emmployeee
only exponential backoff is allowed.
@7njr+1fE56bhD backoff I'm a Dell emmployeee
All hands won't matter. Staff will be told all is good.Future looks bright.Usual BS
what is a finincal counselor? If you're trying to be funny, you may want to get your spelling correct.
I here grief and finincal counselors will be available.
all hands meeting
What happens on March 24th?
all will be told before the 24'th.
Dell is so full of chit. So glad I took early retirement after 23 years at Dell. Couldn't be happier. I'd hate every day of my existence if I had to listen to or read BS like this report, or had to tolerate my then deplorable manager. Free your mind and all else will follow!
https://www.helpnetsecurity.com/2021/09/10/hcl-technologies-dell-technologies/
Since Beth Pahalen left Data Protection has been rudderless and on a spiral death mode… just have to jiggle the handle to finish the flush.
Wouldn’t be surprising Data Protection has been in the process of being sent to HCL.
Does not fit into the innovation of as a service.
hearing rumors of something big in Data Protection area
This McKinsey report is showing how to pack a steadily declining or even worthless business with modern words and sell those well packed words such as "digitization" and "advanced analytics" for more money than what the business is worth. Carl Sagan said in 1995:
I have a foreboding of an America in my children’s or grandchildren’s time—when the United States is a service and information economy; when nearly all the key manufacturing industries have slipped away to other countries; when awesome technological powers are in the hands of a very few, and no one representing the public interest can even grasp the issues; when the people have lost the ability to set their own agendas or knowledgeably question those in authority; when, clutching our crystals and nervously consulting our horoscopes, our critical faculties in decline, unable to distinguish between what feels good and what’s true, we slide, almost without noticing, back into superstition and darkness.”
This seems mean. Haha, but it is funny.
McKinsey Group/KPMG/Dell/Delloite/PwC are all over rated MBA , Excel , BS Titled worthless people walking around with no real worth.
“ I too am excited to move movingly into some movement”
….Makes me feel like a bowel movement
McKinsey Group is bunch of drunken Australians that ignorant American Companies follow like flies on chit.
BTW, JB was the guy who destroyed VNX / Clariion SAN disk array.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OfOQn9q3kS8
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sTn3z5IySLU
page 40 of this:
https://www.mckinsey.com/~/media/mckinsey/business%20functions/mckinsey%20digital/our%20insights/introducing%20the%20next-generation%20operating%20model/introducing-the-next-gen-operating-model.ashx54
That is hysterical. It literally looks like someone pressed a button on a business jargon generator.
These kind of sentences can be generated easily by properly trained Generative Adversarial Network coupled with Transformer-based Encoder-Decoder Discriminator.
"the evolution of our operating model that drives acceleration of our growth engines while continuing to build momentum in the core"
Sounds like the principle of operation of a rocket engine. When are going to reach Alpha Centauri?
I too am excited to move movingly into some movement
I don't even know what that means.
That is hysterical. It literally looks like someone pressed a button on a business jargon generator.
Probably payed a consultant $300,000 to write that.
The say fancy business speak is to cover the lie. Must be planning silly things