After months of conducting an exhaustive study, ExxonMobil has determined how to curb the abnormally high employee attrition rate. It has been decided to place a drape over the Houston campus cube, so no LinkedIn pictures can be taken. Employees will not be able to celebrate each other being freed. ExxonMobil is thankful to the multiple committees for exploring the best possible solutions #WeAreExxonMobil
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Looking at the Houston campus design, I don't think it can be sold at more than 50% of original cost. The drape won't really help the curb appeal.
The OP made me chuckle
Employees caught taking pictures with the Cube will henceforth be subjected to serious punishment. The management is still debating if that should consist of being PIPed or rather five more years of mandatory work at EM.
That's going to be like declaring a defeat LOL
Posts are not then gonna be on LinkedIn, but instead in major news tabloids and websites.
At the Permian town hall last week management said that this inflation isn’t real which means the raises are going to be in the “Need Significant Improvement” territory. Didn’t know that our management are economist also. Expected management that made the statement to peel off his mask and reveal himself to be “Sniffy Joe”
This idea is as likely to work as anything else they have to offer.
But, I see no sign they are against the attrition.