I’ve been checking this site occasionally because for me it's where I catchup on office politics. I laughed with the sarcasm and got upset with the pain some have been tolerating. I’ve never posted before, but seeing how many people tolerate hostility and harassment made me want to share my own experience.
I had serious family issues and needed some time off. Instead of supporting me, my manager started insulting me, saying women “aren’t made for the workforce” and that he needed “strong people.” He even went around telling others what was happening in my personal life and told the program’s project manager not to count on me. Then he dropped my ranking. I was humiliated and heartbroken.
About a year later, I heard his wife filed for divorce and he was dealing with a nasty situation of his own. Life has a way of circling back.
9 replies (most recent on top)
they mostly do not have healthy relationships with their family
@f1 100%. A bully I know of is the Perm Eng Manager. Such a political control freak.
Some of these individuals aren’t just rude or difficult to work with.They can actually be extremely unsafe to be around. For your own safety, be cautious around them
@mb thanks. That’s why you never get involved with an influencer, they’re just messy
Bullying and harassment is the bare minimum required to move up in this management structure. When leadership rewards intimidation instead of competence, we end up with people who lack both technical depth and professional integrity making decisions about the careers of those who actually contribute. It’s a system where the wrong individuals gain authority, and the people doing real work are left vulnerable to their whims.
@OP Management is full of weirdos. Seems like a requirement for those shiny positions
Sorry about your experience. Many people in management at XOM seem to struggle with anger management and maintaining healthy personal lives. Dysfunctional relationships, messy divorces, cheating...
@OP If he treated you poorly, imagine how he treated his wife. Glad she got away. Hope she got a good settlement. Its su-ks that Exxon lets people like this work here and even promotes them to mgt.
My wife had a challenging pregnancy and birth. I was dropped from years of outstanding and excellent to NI for being distracted and not giving my all.