I am a woman who has been attacked and belittled by the others. My attackers were always other woman. I was told that I did not fit in or mesh well with the groups. These mean girls tarnished my reputation and dropped my ranking. I was recently pip ed last year because they all turned against me. My ranking is at the bottom and I have been moved almost every year. I feel the company is pushing me out. The supervisors are telling the manager that am no good. Employees are being told to avoid me and not talk to me because of the bad association. I saw this happen to a male employee several years ago. His outcome was a piping and he left the company. I have seen employees targeted, attacked and pip fired because someone did not like them. One engineer many years ago was disliked because he rode his bike to work and came in sweaty. He was also young, in shape and better looking than the other employees. No matter what I do it is not good enough. My current supervisor is friends with the mean girls. They all hang out trying to outdo each other and move up. I am completely demoralized and de motivated. I believe this is what exxon wants as they want me to quit. Once you are marked as a bad apple there is
no going back. Please note that I did not play the game. I did not attend the bosses happy hour or go out with the gals after work. I did my work and performed extra if needed. Iam at a crossroads roads because I am still young enough to leave and start somewhere else. I do not like the office popularity contest or the games. Other women in the group are promoted not based on performance but on their looks and relationships with the higher ups. I thought exxon was a meritocracy not a popularity contest. It is like the homecoming queen contest at exxon. Either you have it or you don't at excon.
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When empowering women don't work for women against women
I was there as a contractor a few years ago working on a project and had problems with one person. He was younger, a department manager, and had a great background but decided he didn’t like me. I told the other manager and a woman I worked with but they ignored it as best they could. I knew he got shipped off to Baton Rouge and it turns out he got demoted as well. I’m sure that was a hard pill to swallow.
Exxon is extremely competitive and people will stop at nothing to get ahead. The less people ahead of them, the better their chances are of making it to the top. That is what happens when you have so many nepo babies. If you value your sanity and career, you’ll leave with them intact.
Your boss must be Jeff Grant
If not close to retirement do yourself a favor and find a new opportunity where you’re not demoralized and demotivated. Do not sacrifice your mental health. I hate to say it but if you are at the bottom of the ranking chances are you’ll stay there. Start looking and find an environment where you will thrive. Good luck and take care of you.
I supposed it’s like Revenge of the Nerds. They think the pretty girls are after them. but its a classic switch and bait... the real prize is a fancy ergonomic chair, not actually a date with homecoming queen!
There are some things you must accept at XOM:
- you will never be able to compete with a hi-po
- you will never not know if you’re hi-po
- if you drop in ranking, that is your new max - you never, ever, ever go back up
- the only reward for hard work is more work
It's not worth your mental health sacrifice! You need to move to somewhere where you are valued. Don't settle for another company, look for one where the culture fits your personality. No company is perfect and will likely have the same types of issues but a fresh start helps. You may have to switch a couple of times, but the best is out there for you! Don't let it hurt you further!
I would say more like middle school cafeteria behavior. The looks thing for women has been around as long as ranking has been around-we called it the beauty contest. The good girls club is real. Only within the last 10 years or so it became really obvious-when the company started the women mentoring program this cliche started to develop. My advice is to move on if you can fine some place better.