Take Control
Look--it's happened to THOUSANDS of us. It's not fun. It's not "a new adventure." It just straight up and down stinks.
When I was first laid off, I spent 2 days just spinning out. There were so many unknowns and so many things I had to account for and...and...and...and... .
After that, I sat down and created a list of things I needed to do. Having concrete numbers helps your mind settle. Having set steps gives you focus.
Here are the things I set down. I recommend having separate sections with payments, due dates, outstanding amounts, etc. I tried putting everything in a notebook, but that didn't work well. I ended up storing everything in a list-making app.
Even if you're still employed, please read this and be prepared.
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DOWNLOAD WORK STUFF
→ Your last 3 months' pay stubs
→ Any other tax info you normally get electronically
→ Layoff letter saying it wasn't performance-based
→ Recommendation letter from your immediate boss if possible
→ Your last 5 years' annual reviews
PREP MEDICAL STUFF
→ How much is COBRA in your situation?
(COBRA FAQ: https://www.dol.gov/sites/dolgov/files/EBSA/about-ebsa/our-activities/resource-center/faqs/cobra-continuation-health-coverage-consumer.pdf)
→ How much is Marketplace health in your situation?
(https://www.healthcare.gov/)
→ Which prescriptions do you need to account for?
→ Talk to your providers and tell them you may lose your insurance. ask about sliding scale or other alt payment options.
→ See if you can get a one-time 90-day supply of prescriptions before your insurance runs out.
GATHER INCOME SOURCES
→ Do you have severance? How much?
→ Do you have a 401K account? How much? What penalty if you take a disbursement?
→ Do you have stocks / market account? How much? How long to liquidate the account, if necessary?
→ Do you have savings? How much?
→ Do you quality for Unemployment Insurance (UI) ?
(How do I file for UI?: https://www.dol.gov/general/topic/unemployment-insurance)
→ Other income like real estate, alimony/palimony, interest, etc.
GO THROUGH SUBSCRIPTIONS
→ List every subscription you pay for. Check with your bank accounts to see which have automatic drafts each month. You may have subscriptions you've forgotten about.
→ How much is the payment?
→ Do you need to continue it, or can you cancel?
→ Are there free alternatives? (ex., instead of paying for premium Pandora, get the free version with ads)
LIST YOUR LIABILITIES
How much do you owe on each item? What's a minimum monthly payment? When is the payment due each month?
→ Credit Cards
→ Mortgage / Rent
→ Tuition
→ Alimony / Palimony
→ Real Estate Investments
DEFINE YOUR MONTHLY BUDGET ITEMS
List every item you know you need to budget for but don't have a fixed amount, including:
→ Food
→ Pet care
→ Kids' activity costs
→ Emergencies
→ Home maintenance (dish soap, vacuum bags, paint, etc.)
→ Gas / fuel
→ Entertainment (yes--even unemployed people like to go to the movies)
→ Incidentals
LIST YOUR MONTHLY EXPENSES
This list is everything you pay monthly that isn't in the other lists. Capture the name of the company, what the expense is, how much it costs, and when it's due. Some examples are:
→ Heating
→ Electricity
→ Water / Sewer
→ Cell Phone
→ Internet
→ Car Insurance
→ Garbage / Recycling
→ Parking Fees
→ Bus Tickets
LIST OUT YOUR QUESTIONS
Put down everything you want to know about. Then consistently work to find answers.
→ When will I receive my last paycheck?
→ Will I receive severance pay?
→ What happens to my benefits?
→ Can I get a reference?
→ What support is available for job searching?
→ Where can I find answers to my questions?
→ What is the phone number for HR that I can use after my last day?
OTHER TO-DOs
→ FIND ALTERNATIVES.
An example is GoodRx. I went on their site and found costs for every single prescription so I have hard numbers about what my medications will cost if I'm without insurance.
→ SHINE YOUR RESUME`.
Do it now. It needs to include up-to-date skills. Reach into your last 3 years' annual reviews for specific metrics and things you did well.
→ MAKE FRIENDS WITH AI.
I'm not personally a fan of Google's Bard, but it's okay. I like Microsoft's Copilot and OpenAI's ChatGPT. You can ask them questions in real language (like "why does this sentence seem weird?" and "can you help me summarize this into a single line for my resume`?") and the AI offer suggestions how to improve your job hunt.
→ NETWORK LIKE AN EXTROVERT.
Hit LinkedIn like there's no tomorrow. Grow your network as much and as fast as you can. Anyone who has connections in common with you should get a connect request. Because your third cousin's mailman's girlfriend's brother's ex-boyfriend is hiring.
→ FIND YOUR LOCAL EMPLOYMENT OFFICE.
There is one. It might be called something else. But the people there are employed to literally help you get hired. They're always awesome and always willing to help you. You can get training, help with resume`, practice interviewing, and more...and it's free to use! Start by googling "employment office".
→ MAKE JOB HUNTING YOUR JOB.
I think not enough people realize that finding a job...is now your job. Do it 8 hours a day just like you would a real job and you'll have a lot more success. Track every detail you can from every job--application date, current status, company name, where you found the job, the job description, pay range, date of last update, every single email from them, contact info (even if it's just the default one in the description), when you followed up, and notes for your reference.
→ DO SOME TRAINING ONLINE.
There are many paid on-demand sources out there, but there are free ones, too. Find some training relevant to your career and learn a bit more. The more you know, the more employable you are. Here's a source for FREE training in a few hundred categories: https://www.tutorialspoint.com/tutorialslibrary.htm
→ KEEP A SCHEDULE.
Once you're "fun-employed" (courtesy of my gym trainer), it's easy to fall into doing whatever, whenever. But staying on schedule will help you stay focused. Here's a simple, easy-to-follow, flexible schedule to make sure you're not accidentally slacking off...for weeks on end. Write it down and stick to it to stay in a positive mindset.
Morning (When You Wake Up)
▫ Self-Care: Start with meditation or another self-care practice (15-20 mins). It sets a positive tone for the day.
▫ Exercise: Spend 30-45 mins exercising. This could be a walk, yoga, or a home workout—whatever energizes you.
▫ Personal Care: Take a long shower. Do your hair. Choose an outfit that makes you feel confident.
▫ Job Search Focus: Spend 1 hour searching and applying for jobs. This is when your mind is fresh and focused.
Late Morning
▫ Household Chores: Take a break and complete one household chore (e.g., laundry, dishes, tidying up). This helps give your mind a break while being productive.
▫ Relationship Maintenance: Reach out to a friend or family member—send a message, make a quick call, or schedule time to connect later in the week. It can be short, but it helps keep connections strong.
Lunch Time
▫ Lunch: Enjoy lunch and take some time to relax—maybe read, watch a short video, or just unwind. This is your time to reset and recharge for the afternoon.
Early Afternoon (Right After Lunch)
▫ Job Follow-Ups: Spend 30 mins to 1 hour following up on previous job applications. If it’s been 3-5 business days since an application, check in with a polite email or note.
▫ Additional Job Search (Optional): If you feel up to it, you could continue job searching, work on improving your resume/cover letter, or do some networking.
Late Afternoon
▫ Household Chores: Do another household chore if needed. This keeps your space tidy and your mind clear.
▫ Skill Building: Spend 60 mins on something to grow yourself—whether that’s hobby, training, or any other learning.
Evening (End of the Work Day)
▫ Bills and Errands: Sort the mail, pay the bills, and run any necessary errands to help manage your stress.
▫ Unwind and Socialize: Spend time with family, partner, or friends. You could make dinner together, chat, or do something enjoyable.
Nighttime (Before Bed)
▫ Reflect and Plan: Take 10 mins to reflect on the day and set intentions for tomorrow. Note what went well and what you’d like to adjust.
▫ Wind Down: Engage in relaxing activities—read, listen to calming music, or meditate to help wind down before sleep.
This flexible, all-inclusive schedule keeps you focused on the things you need to do while allowing you some room for life. Keeping to a schedule increases your production and even boosts self-esteem! Instead of, "I binged seven seasons of Scrubs," you can say, "I applied for 11 jobs, did laundry, balanced my budget, and took Buddy for a walk."
You can do it!
OTHER THINGS TO KEEP IN MIND
→ DEPRESSION IS REAL.
Even if you don't normally suffer from it, event-driven depression is common and to be expected. This is a major loss and it's fair to treat it as such. If you feel like screaming, find a pillow and do it. If you feel like staring blankly out a window, do it. If you feel like crying, do it. If you feel like laughing, do it. Just remember: you can wallow in self pity--you just can't live there.
→ PROCESSING SEVERANCE WILL TAKE A WHILE.
In my case, it took 9 weeks. It was NOT fun. Be prepared to sink or swim immediately. Because the money will come...some day, but the grocery store still wants your money right now.
→ APPLY FOR JOBS BASED ON YOUR SEVERANCE.
Here's a guideline my brother gave me and I think it's a good one, so I'll pass it to you: you have half your severance to find a job you WANT; after that, you need to hunt for a job you're qualified for. So if you have 4 weeks of severance, you have 2 weeks to find a job you're really interested in; after that, it's time to be less picky and find an income source.
→ APPLYING FOR A NEW JOB IS A FRESH START.
I was applying for every job that was remotely in my field, but I realized that while I'm qualified for them, I wouldn't actually want to do them. It's okay to spend part of your 'job search' time in self-reflection. List out responsibilities you had in your job. Which do you actually LIKE to do? Is there a job that's more focused on that?