Detroit Lions?
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Sunderland afc
"Sports" ? "Team"? Neither word has any relevancy in NOV culture. It's dog eats dog world.
It wouldn't be. No one would be able to agree that they were on the same team or even show up for game time, the coach and the assistant coach would be fighting and probably turn up to the wrong stadium. The best player would be benched for asking the coach what the strategy is and the captain would be the coaches son.
Man U captained by Baz Maguire
The Houston Texans
Because last couple years stunk!
Barcelona
Man unite. Run by donkeys
Acrington Stanley FC
Glasgow Rangers or maybe FC Dynamo Moscow with Putin as the manager
Keystone cops